Friday, March 23, 2007

The Invasion is upon us. . .

Greetings from Boone Court. You know, Boone has been a great place to live so far. Spacious interior, great party basement, room for 5. But with the good comes the bad. Like...a driveway composed of mud and rainwater that you get stuck in and have to eventually call a tow truck to pull you out of. Or a steep rent price for a drafty house (which makes for 340$ electric/gas bills 3 or 4 months of the year) and water leaking through electrical light fixtures via the kitchen ceiling. But let's face it, this is a college town, and thus, this is a college house. You're not gonna get luxury unless you live in bluff ridge or those other apartments off tratt street that I can't think of right now. Anyways, this house is old. On our circuit breaker downstairs, I believe theres a note written that says, "Installed & Inspected by (name)- 1957". Super. I feel safe.

So, with the seasons changing, so does Boone. A once cozy home in the winter, it now becomes a death trap. A lingering funk hangs in the air (And no, it's not the soiled couches that produce this funk). This is a completely different vibe. A sense of hostility. A sense of fear. The moist air beckons for the beast to come out of its lair. The predator has been incubating many a month, and is now itching to bask in the Wisconsin....darkness? Of course I'm referring to...

...the House Centipede. Think of the movie arachnophobia. But instead of spiders, we have centipedes. Big, small, medium, fat, skinny, ray lewis-like...they squirm in all shapes & sizes. And we have all forms. May God have mercy on the 5 poor women who inherit this house for the 2007-2008 school year. By the time they move in around late August, Jon and I will most likely have killed 100 of these things. And that's not an exagerration. During the Summer of 2006, I recall me and Jon being deadlocked at 48 a piece. I'm also not kidding when I say I'm going to document every single kill I (and Jon, if I'm here) make of these bastards. I'm putting my life to good use people. I started with a an associates in journalism and I'm leaving with a doctorate in centipede removal.

Embedded below this are two videos from a bit before midnight on March 23, 2007. I went to the kitchen to clean off a dish, and above my food cabinet was a nasty 2-incher. Sounds small, but the antannae adds a few pounds. Either way, sorry for the camera problems and the sound; it was the first time I took video with my digital camera (shout out to Mom for the digi). Enjoy, as I'm sure there will be more to come.

The Intro:

and the thrill of victory:

And that's how it's done. With a shoe. Cuz centipedes will crawl out of paper towel, laugh in the general direction of fly swatters, and do the backstroke when doused with water. Next up: High Intensity Raid, and eventually - Brake Fluid.
Please go here to learn about our adversary:

Till then, happy hunting.

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